What Do I Reach For When I Don’t Know What’s Next?

Faith, uncertainty, and learning to trust God with the unfinished parts of my story.

I’ve been asking myself a question lately that I honestly don’t always like the answer to:

What do I reach for when I don’t know what’s next?

Because uncertainty has a way of exposing us.

When I don't have the answer, do I pray?

Do I panic?

Do I overthink?

Do I try to control everything?

Do I distract myself?

Do I start trying to figure out everybody else's life?

I’ve realized something about myself: sometimes I’m not actually afraid of what’s next.

I’m uncomfortable because I can’t control what’s next.

And that realization is teaching me something.

Uncertainty Is Teaching Me to Be Present

There are areas of my life right now where I don't have a neat five-step plan.

Some things are still unfolding.

Some questions don't have answers yet.

And some things I thought would look different by this point simply don't.

Honestly?

That's uncomfortable.

At 53, approaching 54, I thought I would have certain things figured out. I thought I would feel more certain. I thought I would have greater clarity about what this next chapter was going to look like.

But maybe the next chapter isn't supposed to be completely clear yet.

Maybe I don't need the whole picture.

I don't need to know the whole story to be faithful with today's page.

That has been a reminder I’ve needed lately.

### So What Do I Reach For?

When uncertainty shows up, I notice that I often reach for control.

I start thinking:

Let me figure this out.

Let me make a plan.

Let me fix it.

Let me make sure this doesn't go wrong.

Planning isn't bad. In fact, planning can be wise.

But sometimes my planning isn't wisdom.

Sometimes it's my attempt to make uncertainty feel safe.

So I've started asking myself:

“Am I planning because God has given me something to do—or because I'm afraid to wait?”

That's a different question.

And sometimes I reach for certainty.

I want an answer.

I want confirmation.

I want somebody to tell me what this means.

I want to know how the story ends.

But I'm learning that sometimes I don't need another answer.

I need the courage to live without one.

Sometimes I Reach for Distraction

This one has made me really honest with myself.

When I'm uncomfortable, I can fill the space.

Scroll.

Shop.

Work.

Plan another trip.

Start another project.

Consume more content.

Stay busy.

And there's nothing inherently wrong with any of those things.

But I have to ask myself:

Am I enjoying my life—or am I avoiding sitting with myself?

There is a difference between resting and escaping.

There is a difference between enjoying something and using something to avoid something.

Because busyness can make uncertainty quieter without actually making it disappear.

And I don't want to spend my life filling every quiet space because I'm afraid of what I might hear in it.

I'm Learning to Reach for God First

This is where I'm growing.

I'm learning that uncertainty doesn't have to be an emergency.

I don't have to immediately solve what God hasn't asked me to solve.

I can bring the question to God without demanding an immediate answer.

Instead of constantly praying:

“God, tell me what's next.”

I'm learning to pray:

“God, help me be present for what's here.”

Instead of:

“What is going to happen?”

I'm asking:

“What are You inviting me to learn?”

Instead of:

“How do I make this work?”

I'm asking:

“What is mine to do—and what do I need to release?”

And maybe that's where peace begins.

Peace doesn't always come from knowing what's next. Sometimes peace comes from knowing Who is with me.

Three Things I'm Learning About Myself

1. I'm more uncomfortable with uncertainty than I realized.

I like clarity.

I like plans.

I like knowing what I'm working toward.

But I'm learning that faith requires room for things I cannot see yet.

2. I've sometimes confused waiting with doing nothing.

Waiting isn't necessarily passive.

There are still habits to build.

Relationships to nurture.

Work to do.

Joy to experience.

A life to live.

I can wait on God while still showing up for today.

3. I don't want uncertainty to steal today from me.

I don't want to spend today's energy trying to solve tomorrow.

I don't want to miss what's beautiful because I'm obsessed with what's unresolved.

I refuse to sacrifice today's joy trying to guarantee tomorrow's outcome.

So What Do You Reach For?

That's the question I'm leaving with you today.

What do you reach for when you don't know what's next?

Control?

People?

Your phone?

Work?

Food?

Shopping?

Planning?

Isolation?

Achievement?

Or God?

And I'm not asking that question to shame you.

I'm asking because awareness gives us a choice.

The next time uncertainty shows up, I'm practicing four simple steps:

PAUSE → NOTICE → NAME → CHOOSE

Pause. Don't immediately react.

Notice. What am I feeling?

Name. What am I reaching for?

Choose. What would it look like to reach for God instead?

Maybe I don't need to know what's next.

Maybe I just need to trust God enough to take the next right step.

And maybe that's what becoming HER again looks like sometimes—not having all the answers, but learning to trust God while the story is still unfolding.

We're continuing this conversation on Monday Night Live at 7:00 PM.

We'll talk about healing, uncertainty, and what happens when we don't know what's next.

This isn't a conversation about having all the answers.

It's about learning how to stay present, stay anchored, and keep moving while the story is still unfolding.

If you're in a season where you're asking, “God, what's next?”—come sit at the table with me.

What do YOU reach for when you don't know what's next?

I'd love to hear from you in the comments.